Month: October 2017

When checking on the chickens, I noticed Beyoncegg hanging out in the nesting box. She’s not one to usually go broody, but I figured she was busy with egg laying. When I came back later and checked for eggs, she was still there. I opened the coop door and she was struggling to get out of the box. When she did get out and walk away, I noticed goopy runny egg around her vent. I remembered reading somewhere about eggs that could be broken inside the chicken, and I picked her up and brought her inside.

I put her in the sink and held on to her so she wouldn’t go wildly flapping around and asked Ryan to look up on his phone what we should do with her. “It says take her to the vet.” Are you kidding? I don’t want a huge vet bill so I decided to wash her vent with warm water and see if I could remove any shell with tweezers or fingers. I was able to grab a piece of a rubbery egg shell (the shell doesn’t get hard until right before the egg is laid) and pull it out.

Sometimes things go wrong in the egg laying cycle, and it could be dangerous to the bird if not taken care of. I read up about it here.

Gross, yes. But cheaper than a vet visit.

I did a dove release for another funeral today. Another unexpected death, possibly a suicide, but I don’t know.

After I let the doves go, the funeral director said a few words. He mentioned that there are two times in the Bible. According to the biblical story (Genesis 8:11), a dove was released by Noah after the flood in order to find land; it came back carrying a freshly plucked olive leaf , a sign of life after the Flood and of God’s bringing Noah, his family and the animals to land.

Also, when John the Baptist baptized Jesus Christ in the Jordan River, he saw the Spirit of God descending like a dove and alighting on him.

The dove is a symbol for peace, and for coming home. When we release the doves at the gravesite, they circle around a few times, and then they fly home. Hopefully all of them arrive back at their home for their food and shelter before I even get back home.

Just as the dove flies home, so do our spirits go home. Home to our heavenly home.

I appreciated those words that he spoke, and told him so.

I enjoy doing the dove releases. It’s peaceful and beautiful when they fly out of the box and circle around.

What’s not peaceful and beautiful, however, is finding the cemetery and making sure you get there on time. Today’s service was in Eagle Mountain. That’s pretty far out there. I was there a bit early, and it’s a pretty small place, so it was easy to find the grave.
However, a lady was supposed to give me cash or a check for the doves, and no one came up to me to offer me money (sad, right? But usually they pre pay or give me a check there). I texted Pam, the owner of Wings of Love, and asked if she knew who was supposed to pay me. I figured if I just stayed there after the dove release, the person who requested the doves would step forward. Nope. She was stuck at work, and could I meet her at the Maverick gas station. Hmmm. I texted her directly and said, yes, I would meet her at the Maverick gas station. I put Maverick Eagle Mountain into my phone and off I went. But then she called and asked where I was. Seems there are two Mavericks, and I was going to the wrong one. Oh, heavens. She asked where I was, and when I told her, she said, “Pull over. I’ll come find you. I’m in a big grey truck.” I told her what I was driving and said I would wait. I was worried for a little bit, thinking, that it sounded a bit like a set up for murder, but I figured, I would just stay in my car. When the big grey truck pulled up behind me, I had a flash of panic, but it was actually a lady carrying a check. Crisis averted. Pam will get paid, I will get paid, and the doves will fly safely home.

Seeing everyone’s “Me, Too” posts is making me sad and shocked. If you don’t know what that is, it started when Alyssa Milano tweeted “if all the women who have been sexually harassed or assaulted wrote “Me too” as a status, we might give people a sense of the magnitude of the problem.” You can read more here.

I thought through my life and I can’t really say that I have been sexually harassed or assaulted, but then my mind went back to middle school. Oh, the dreaded middle school. Where girls are just starting to experience menstruation and the boys are crude, rude, and crass. When it was “that time of the month”, I lived in fear that my pad would leak and I’d have blood on my pants. After sitting at a desk for 45 minutes or longer, when you stand up, it pretty much feels like a gush of liquid and I was always terrified there would be an accident. Feminine protection has come a long way in 30 years, so I hope that girls don’t have that same terror. If you saw girls with sweatshirts or sweaters tied around their waist, that wasn’t always just a fashion statement. Boys were stupid, and if a girl said something that they perceived as snarky, comments like, “Oh, she’s on the rag,” or similar crass remarks abounded.

The worst experiences were in shop class. Yes, I took metal shop with two of my friends. I think there were 5 girls in that class. Some of my friends loved it. I did not. The boys in that class were jocks and jerks, and none of them friends of mine. It was hard for me to speak up and get a turn using the welder or other tools because the boys just scared me. There was constant talk of sex and lude remarks. I don’t know where the shop teacher was. I tried to laugh it off, but inside I felt like curling up into a ball. Someone started singing, “Come on baby, light my fire,” when they needed a light for a torch or a welder (which seemed to be all the time). I still hate that song. And heaven forbid if I WERE on my period and had to go to shop class. Every comment made me cringe and shirk and feel dirty and helpless.

Was I overreacting? Harmless talk? Maybe. But it wasn’t a locker room, it was a class room, and it was not a safe place for me. I passed that class, but with a C. Because I could never get time on the welder (because I was afraid and intimidated) I ended up making a bunch of twisted wire trees, similar to these.

I don’t know where any of those trees are, now. Probably in my parents’ attic or given away as “gifts”. I’m kind of glad I don’t know where they are, because looking at them would make me feel small.

Women and girls should not have to feel shame because their bodies are performing their functions. Yes, we have ovaries. And Fallopian tubes. Wake up.

Contrast this to right after my mission. I was SO much in missionary mode, but I needed a job, so I signed up with a temp agency. I was sent to work at a cabinet manufacturing facility. I would write labels for the cabinet orders. I don’t know why they didn’t have a computer to do that, but there I was, with a bunch of cabinet makers. I didn’t know anyone, and when in the break room for lunch, there was a lot of foul language. One guy threw around f bombs and other such gems a LOT. I did my best to ignore, but didn’t say anything. I probably cringed, though. I don’t know. After a couple of days, something nasty came out of his mouth, but then he looked at me, and said, “Sorry, I’m trying to quit.” I hadn’t mentioned that his language was offensive to me, but he noticed, and tried to do better when I was around.

I don’t want to minimize other’s experiences with my own, just notice that sexual harassment is prevalent everywhere.

It’s hard to have faith that the Me Too campaign, or something like the #WomenBoycottTwitter movement will make a difference. But maybe they are two very small steps towards a more just future for victims.

If you are a victim of sexual assault, you can visit RAINN or call its hotline at 1-800-656-4673 to receive confidential support from a trained staff member.

It’s been an emotional day for me. After 2 1/2 years of serving the wonderful sisters of my ward, I was released today from the calling of Relief Society President.
Never before have I had a calling where I learned so much, stretched out of my comfort zone so much, and relied on the Lord so much.
I have loved serving these sisters. I have loved the relationships I’ve built and the joy of service. We had a successful Relief Society Retreat 2 weeks ago, and it was a great “last activity” for our presidency.

Yes, It’s had it’s down side (visiting teaching changes, early morning meetings on Sundays when the rest of the family gets to sleep in, and the like), but I can honestly say I’ve loved this calling. I have the absolute best counselors and people working with me, and I feel so very blessed. I’m thankful for the blessings I have received. I feel like I’ve become a more caring, less judgmental person, and I hope that I can keep those qualities as a part of me forever.

I’m not a person who embraces change, especially endings. Once I have people I love in my life I don’t want to let them go.
So, this is a little bit difficult for me to take a step back and trust in the Lord that whatever comes next will also be wonderful. I can still see and visit these sisters that I love.

I am so grateful for the support and love I have received during this time in my life, and for 2 amazing Bishops who have supported and taught me.

Someone asked me what I was going to do with my free time, now that I’ve been released. Free time? I’m sure I’ll fill it with something. But until then, perhaps I should get my office cleaned up. I’ll work on that for my goal for this week.

We recently got the exciting news that we are going to be grandparents! It’s the job we’ve trained all our lives for. Not sure if I should start buying pink things or blue things, but don’t worry, I’ll find the cute tiny things for my future grand baby. The big question is, what do we want to be called? Ryan thinks the standard “Grandpa” is good, but I’m thinking about it.