The Trials of a Busy Mom
Lest you think that I have an amazingly fast camera, these pictures were NOT all taken on the same swing. At Jenna’s age, they let the kids swing at as many pitches as it takes. They even bring out the “T” if they need to so that each kid gets to hit. I think with rules like that I might even try softball. I said “might”.
I attended the LDS Women’s Conference on Thursday at BYU, and it was a wonderful day. Unfortunately, my dear friend, Robin, couldn’t make it, due to an unfortunate dishwasher incident, but I hope she’s getting that cleaned up and I missed having her here this weekend. Yes, there was snow on the ground, and yes, it was very cold. But the classes are all indoors and it’s always fun to walk around BYU, even in the cold. Since I went with my friend Candice who gets to park in handicapped parking, we didn’t even have to make the trek from the stadium up to the Marriot Center! Since I couldn’t go both days, I felt like I really had to make the best of my one day of the conference, but it’s so difficult choosing which class to go to. They all sound so good, but sometimes you get in one that you thought was going to be the greatest class just for you, and it’s a little bit of a disappointment. When trying to decide what classes to go to, I even thought of just randomly following the crowd and going into whatever class I came to, but nixed that idea. What if I ended up in a Spanish class or a class on single parenting or something that didn’t apply to me?
One of my classes was on Family Scripture Study. I didn’t take any notes from this class because I was in a service room, and I was busy coloring butterflies the whole time. Seriously–butterflies. They are part of a folder game with matching patterns that will go to orphanages around the world. It was fun to get my coloring on, and I really like to have something to do with my hands while listening.
This was a great class, because instead of making me feel like a horrible mother because we aren’t the best at having family scripture study (I feel horrible enough about that already, for heaven’s sake, I don’t need them to lay on a bunch more guilt, right?), they gave us ideas of how some families have organized their scripture time, and gave suggestions and motivation. One thing thing that I thought was so important was that we need to be flexible. Our families and our situation and our needs change, and we need to be ready to adapt and change our scripture time. She used the example of shopping for jeans for a 12 year old daughter–You know she’s not going to be wearing these jeans at the end of the school year, yet you spend time and money finding the perfect fit for her now. We may need to change our scripture study routine in 6 months because our schedules will change, and that’s ok. We still need to find something that works right now.
One idea for young families was to concentrate on one verse for a whole week. This mother said she spent the first minute marching around and singing “scripture power” with the kids. Even dad would sing and march. The next minute was spent finding the verse of the day and marking it in the scriptures, then they read it out loud together. The next minute was talking about why this verse was important and what it meant, and then they had family prayer. They would do variations of this every day, all on the same scripture. So, they spent 4 or 5 minutes each day, but by the end of the week, the kids would know the scripture reference and some of them had it memorized.
Some families each wrote down a few of their favorite scriptures and put them in a jar. They would then choose one verse each day before dinner and read it and talk about why it was important and a family favorite.
One mother said that the best time for their family seemed to be the few minutes between dinner and dessert. That’s when they did their family scripture reading. We’ve been each reading a verse right before dinner. But we haven’t been real consistent, lately. It’s also very slow going, and I’d like to devote more time than just 3-5 minutes, so I think in the summer, we’re going to get a time set in the morning. I’d like to challenge my oldest kids to read the whole Book of Mormon this summer. I think they could do it.
Kids learn language skills when they are young, and before 10 years old is the best time to introduce new languages. The words of the scriptures are in essence a different language, and if children get used to reading and hearing them when they are young, they will be more proficient at reading as they grow up.
It was even suggested that parents can text their children a scripture or verse during the day that might have something to do with their challenges of the day. If they had a big test, for example, it might be comforting to receive
D&C 38: 30
” I tell you these things because of your prayers; wherefore, treasure up wisdom in your bosoms, lest the wickedness of men reveal these things unto you by their wickedness, in a manner which shall speak in your ears with a voice louder than that which shall shake the earth; but if ye are prepared ye shall not fear.”
Since kids are so computer smart, it was suggested that they have turns looking up scripture references online. With the help if the internet, it gives a whole new meaning to “search the scriptures”. You could give each child a topic, and have them look through the gospel library at LDS.org to come up with 3 or 4 (or more) scriptures on that subject, and share with the family.
I really liked the idea to celebrate your reading accomplishments. If you read every day of a week, have a small celebration at the end of the week! Two weeks? another celebration. I’m all about the celebrations, let me tell you. Then as you are more and more in the habit of reading, you can celebrate less frequently. Or see if you can set a record of how many days your family studies the scriptures without breaking the streak. 100? 200? more?
As you can see, this was a great class with so many suggestions and hints to help us figure out what works for our family. I hope this information helps you and your family, as I know it has been a great encouragement to me.
Just because your child is playing quietly, does NOT mean he or she is not getting into trouble.
For example: John had been happily playing upstairs and I was kind of relieved that he wasn’t here making a mess while I was cleaning the kitchen. Soon, however, he came downstairs with his sad little face and showed me that his finger was bleeding. When I put his band-aid on, I noticed that his hands were covered in glitter. “What have you been doing, John?” He did not want to tell me, but said that he would whisper it in my ear. Hmmm. This could be bad. “I broke a snowglobe,” he said. I decided I’d better go and investigate.
The problem was, I couldn’t tell which of the disasterous bedrooms he had ravaged. They all looked like a tasmanian devil had been there. I called to him and asked him to come and show me where the snow globe was. Reluctantly he came upstairs and showed me the broken snowglobe. It was indeed broken, and there was water, glitter and glass shards covering pretty much everything. I sent him back downstairs so I could clean this one up on my own. Yes, I cut myself in the process, too.
So, my friends, just because your child is quiet (or even singing, in the case of my friend’s little girl), never assume for one minute that they aren’t getting into trouble.
I may have mentioned that I wanted to get new chairs for my family room. The recliners we had in there were only 10+ years old, falling apart, and I hated them. So, I undertook the perilous job of shopping for new chairs. I liked something like this
or this 
and I looked through a catalog at chairs like this 
, but then you have to pick out fabric and a chair site unseen, and I didn’t know if I could visualize that. 
Finding those fancy furniture stores just too expensive, I decided to go to IKEA and check their selection of chairs. I liked the Ektorp chair, and thought it was great that I could just get slipcovers that come off and can be washed, or even changed up when I got bored with the color, 
but I kept in mind that Ryan was really set on having recliners. Even though I tried to convince him that we could get grown up people chairs and still be happy, he insisted that these would be tv watching chairs for the family room, and therefore they should recline.
I immediately fell in love with the most expensive leather recliner that IKEA carries, the Vreta. OK, maybe it’s not the MOST expensive, but it was quite a bit more than the old Ektorp over there. Isn’t that a beautiful chair? 
And it reclines, swivels and rocks! But maybe I was just drawn to the chair because of the great color. And I already have a dark red leather sofa in my family room, so I wasn’t sure how that would work out. Overwhelmed with the task of picking out the chairs by myself, I even called Ryan at work, and he made the long long trip to IKEA (in 10 minutes or less) during his lunch break. He tested my favorites 
and soon found that my favorite was also his favorite. 
But what color? Could I pull off that much red in my family room, and would it match? Or could I possibly do white chairs? Yes, it’s lovely, but it’s white, and I have kids. Oh, the decisions! 
In order to compare the reds, I took a picture of my red purse with the red recliner 
and then at home I compared the red purse to the red couch I have. 
No, they didn’t match.
I let all this circulate in my mind for a few days, and then when I thought I had it figured out I went back to the Swedish store, this time with my kids. They think we just go to IKEA for the fun of it. They all three (I only took three) got into the playland, and had a grand time there while I was deciding on chairs. I decided to go traditional, and picked out two of the brown Vreland chairs. 
Brown being my least favorite of the colors (I would have loved to buy the red, or the white), but seeing as the kids will be sitting in the chairs, and the close proximity of the family room to the kitchen, I decided that brown was the best choice. Conservative and practical, yes, but still really cool chairs. After ordering the chairs, I had to arrange for delivery, since they are not a chair that they keep in stock. As I was waiting for the delivery person, my pager went off and I had to go and pick up the kids. They were red faced and happy. Jumping into that ball pit wears you out. But they were also hot and thirsty! Next stop, snack bar! So, being the good mom that I am, and happily relieved to have finally made the big decisions, I sprung for hot dogs, ice cream and a soda! Woo-Hoo! That’s how you know it’s an outing, and not just a shopping trip, folks. If there’s ice cream involved. After the kids cooled off and finished the snacks, I went back to the delivery desk. The sweet lady working there was very relieved to see me. “Oh, THERE you are!” she said. “When I was done with the other customer I looked for you, and I thought that was you over there on the chair. I’m afraid I woke her up to ask her if she was ready to arrange delivery, and she looked up at me and said, ‘I’m just so tired, can I rest for a minute more?’ And then I felt so bad!” Oh, this sweet lady had been looking for me. How sweet. Not so sweet that so woke up that poor lady asleep in the chair in the corner with her tiny baby in the carseat. Her husband is probably shopping, and she took a moment to rest. I felt bad for her. Anyway, we arranged for delivery, and my kids and I were off on our merry way.
About a week and a half later, I got a call from the delivery company telling me they had my chairs and could they come the next day? OF Course! I cleaned up the family room, we moved the old recliners out of the way, and waited for the delivery truck to bring my new chairs. 
About 2:00, the truck came! It’s so exciting waiting for a delivery, isn’t it? 
I managed to get this out of the box, 
and then Cole came home from school, and I had him help me do the assembly. As you can see from the instructions, it’s pretty complicated. 
Since he did the “assembly”, he got to be the first to recline in the new chair 
and then for an added bonus, he got to have one of the boxes. Think of it as a birthday present, son. 
I can’t tell you how much fun the kids have had with these two boxes! The girls took theirs and decorated the sides, cutting out windows and doors, and even used the foam sheets that came in the boxes as ‘carpet’. Cole wants to save his box intact so that he can use it for a future magic show. As it turned out, the boxes came at a convenient time, because the next day I was to host a playgroup for john plus seven of his little compadres. Because we have 8 in our group, we’re all thrilled that our turn to host only comes along every 8 weeks, but when it does, we wrack our brains on what to do with 8 rambunctious little boys for almost two hours. Especially when the weather is cold. Well, among other things (like making cookies, decorating cole’s failed birthday cake, playing with play-doh and puzzles and trains), I let them play in the boxes. 
and at one point had seven of them inside the box. 
Maybe I should have just taped it closed then, and seen how long it would take them to get out–ha, ha. Just kidding! Don’t go and report me for child neglect or anything, I’m kidding! So, aren’t they cute, the boys in a box? 
Happy Birthday, Megan!
Megan has always been an independent spirit. When she was little, she would only smile at us. Whenever we went to family functions and her aunts would fawn over her, she would just scowl at them. My sister tells me that the reason she went into labor with her son was from watching Megan scowl at her on her blessing day. She laughed so hard at her little grumpy face she went into labor that night.
Oh, but good heavens she was cute.
I was so excited to have a little girl I could put in little girly dresses with bows in her hair. If I had only known. She ripped all bows out of her hair when she was little, and can’t stand frilly stuff now. 
Why do they have to grow up? They were so dang cute, then!
I remember when Megan was about two, maybe three, and she was playing with our bird, Sundance. She had him up in her room, probably in a stroller or something fun, and she pulled out all his tail feathers. Oh, she’s an animal lover, that one.
She didn’t like bows, but she would wear hats. She still wears hats. Lots of hats.
Eventually she did learn to smile, and along with that she learned to tease. I can’t say she’s always the best older sister, but I do believe that deep down she loves her sisters (and her brothers). 
You can tell by that smile right there that she’s got a mischievous side to her, can’t you?
Megan is a great girl, and not afraid of hard work. She is the one who will do extra jobs around the house to earn money, and usually if you ask her to help you do something, she will do it. She plays soccer like a maniac, and doesn’t mind the hours of practice. She LOVES sports and is very active. If only I could get her to have the same enthusiasm for playing the piano.
Megan’s a good student, and really enjoys school. Although when I mentioned that she’d have to take math in 7th grade next year, she said, “Again with the math?” Well, yes. Get used to it. There will always be math. It seems like just yesterday she was in Kindergarten, and now she’ll be moving out of elementary school and into junior high this year. 
Here she is with her Kindergarten teacher, who she loved.
Wow. My little girl is growing up. She’ll be leaving the ranks of primary behind her and entering the young women’s program. I guess I can’t stop them from growing up. I’ll just have to be proud of them as they do it.
Happy Birthday, Megan-Moo. I love you.
Friday night Cole had his birthday party, and I’ve never hosted an easier party. I asked him what he wanted to do for his party, and he said they wanted to play Wii and Guitar Hero and some other stuff. Ok. So, when asked what he wanted me to do, it was pretty much get food and stay out of the way. So, I got the house cleaned, I bought snacks and drinks, and ordered pizza. Julene the fantastic did a cake for him, and we were all set.
And that was really about all I did. The kids played games, mostly on the TV, and ate pizza and snacks. Although I felt a bit bad for the three girls who he invited, I heard from their moms that they had a good time. It just seemed like they weren’t really getting to have turns playing the Wii games, but when I did see them, they seemed to be laughing or smiling. I would have liked them to play some more “group games” like apples to apples or cranium, but as I was reminded, it wasn’t my party, and so I let Cole be in charge.
But the important thing is that Cole had fun. He had the kind of party he wanted, and had fun with his friends. I actually had fun with my friends, too. Michelle brought her boys to the party, and we convinced her to watch Enchanted upstairs with the girls. We had a fun little girl party painting nails and toenails, and even John got his toes painted. I would pop down every once in while to see how things were going, but tried to stay out of the way as much as possible. Ryan was also close by in his office, and he would walk through the party zone every so often (lest you think it was an unchaperoned party!).
And speaking of guitar hero (weren’t we?), here’s a funny one for you.
And today Megan handed out the invitations for her birthday party, which will be this Friday. More of the same. She’s planning her own party, too, and I believe they want to play outside (provided it’s not snowing–ugh), play Wii and have pizza, too. Her party’s just girls, so I’m sure there will be much more giggling involved. I’ll have to let you know how that one goes, too.
First of all, let me assure you that there is NO WAY that we are old enough to have a 14 year old. Honestly. I don’t know how he’s gotten so old! But, he has, and Happy Birthday to Cole.
When Cole was about to be born, we had to drive from Lehi to Payson, which is about a 35 minute drive. Luckily, we didn’t wait until the last second, and so the contractions were not the worst. I really just didn’t want them to tell me to go home, that I wasn’t really in labor. But I was. On the way to Payson, driving our Toyota Camry, we were listening to the radio (it was the middle of the night, what else were we going to do?) and a special song came on. A song, that if ever I hear that song again, I will always be reminded of our Cole, and the day he came into the world. Well, truth be told, there were a couple of songs that we remember, one goes “74, 75” and the other goes “Once there was this kid who got into an accident and couldn’t come to school…” by the Crash Test Dummies. I looked it up and just now found out that song is called “Mmm Mmm Mmm Mmm” No wonder I never knew what that song was called!
So, fast forward 14 years to today, and Cole is now 14! You’ll all be happy to know that he got his grades up so that he WILL be able to have his party this Friday night. There was some doubt about it, but yes, he brought his English grade up to a C, so all grades are at the acceptable stage (not that I’m happy about that C, ’cause you know I’m not) so that he can hold his party. He’s planned the whole thing and they are going to play Wii, Kareoke, eat Pizza and generally have a bunch of fun with very little interruption from mom. I am here to “quietly chaperone”, not to be the party planner–oh yes, he’s told me I should stay out of the way as much as possible. Ok, I think I can do that. I am also to bring out non-stop food, I guess.
For one of his presents, he has asked for his own website/blog. He doesn’t know it yet, but the boy now has a blog. I’m not sure if we’ll password protect it or what, but if you’d like to leave him a birthday greeting on his blog, you can click here. So, Happy Birthday, kid. You’re the one who made me a mom, and now you’re making me feel old.
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And totally off the subject, it’s turning out to be a good day! This morning I heard my name on the radio as one of the qualifiers for a trip to New York to see Josh Grobin. They call out four names a day, and the contest runs about a week, so that’s maybe 24 qualifiers, if everyone calls back when they hear their name. Those are better odds than the 1/98 chance I had to win that car last weekend, so cross your fingers for me, and check back next Tuesday to see if I win!
First of all, thank you to all of you who gave advice on our teenager’s school issues. I really appreciate it.
This morning, we have had a few issues with my other son, who is four. He came into our room at his usual 7:00, and was complaining that his side hurt. I helped him into bed with me, and asked him where it hurt. His left side. He was breathing heavily, and kind of writhing around. I asked him if he had hurt it or bonked it or fallen down or anything. No. I asked Ryan (who was home with the kids last night) if he remembered if John had hurt himself. No. I’m trying to figure out if his stomach feels yucky, or if it’s just his side, but I’m not getting too much information from him. He keeps saying “it’s the twist”, and I wonder if perhaps he could have a sore muscle.
I got up to use the bathroom, and asked him if he wanted to go down for breakfast. “No,” he said softly. This is when I knew that something was WRONG. This is my kid who wants breakfast immediately, and sometimes eats two or three breakfasts in a morning. I took him down stairs, and offered him the nectar of the Gods… a Capri Sun. He refused, saying he wasn’t thirsty. I was starting to panic, now, because something must be terribly wrong. We called our neighbor, who is a doctor, but he had already left for work. I called our pediatrician, but they didn’t have anyone in the office yet. I did a quick google search for “pain left side” and got this here helpful chart which lists a bunch of possible reasons for pain on the left side–all of them requiring you to call 911 or go to the emergency room immediately. That was not comforting at all.
I decided I’d better quickly get dressed, so I could whisk him off to the doctor’s office as soon as they opened. So I threw some clothes on and made myself 1/2 way presentable and came back downstairs to check on him. “How are you feeling, bud?” I asked nervously, “do you want some breakfast?”
“I feel ok,” he said, ” can I have a yogurt after this show?”
What? You feel fine? He was sitting up, and after the show he got up and asked for his juice box and yogurt. So, I fed him his breakfast, and then he was running around like a normal kid.
“Does your side not hurt anymore?” I asked.
“No, it’s gone,” he said.
How is this possible? He’s excited about going to his sports class and is happily watching tv right now.
I’m very relived that he’s feeling better, but I am just wondering what in the world was causing the pain, and is it going to come back? I think it was all part of a well calculated plan to keep me from going to yoga today.
I’m frustrated with my 13 year old. He is a smart kid but he just doesn’t remember to turn his assignments in. I sometimes wonder if he’d remember his right arm if it weren’t attached. He missed a few days of school to go on a trip with my parents, and since then it’s been a struggle to catch up. I feel like all I do is nag and nag and nag and get on his case about his grades, and yesterday I really lost my temper and yelled at him. I felt like a horrible mother, he felt like a horrible kid, we all felt horrible!
I need some suggestions on how I can help him be responsible for his own work, and get it all turned in ON TIME. One friend suggested I go to school in my pajamas with him and sit by him during all his classes and remind him to write things down or turn things in. My husband told him about a friend of his whose son got bad grades, and then was his dad’s slave for the summer. While these are great ideas, they seem a little bit drastic to me.
So I would like your suggestions or things that have worked with your teenage boys.
Thank you in advance.
I’m linking in with Shannon’s Works for me Wednesday where lots of people are asking questions today.
John (who came into my bathroom while I was drying my hair): Mom! Mom! The tv went to all blue! You need to fix it!
Me: Because I am SuperMom and I can fix anything, right?
John: No.
Me (not letting this go): Come on, say, it. Say, ‘you’re supermom!’
John: You’re not supermom. It’s ‘superDOG’, Mom.
Me (feeling a bit disgruntled at the lack of respect my son is showing me): But I’m the superMOM, right?
John: Nope.
Thanks a lot, kid. See if I drive your carpool on the fieldtrip today.
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