Author: Superpaige (Page 80 of 180)

Last weekend I was breaking out the capri pants and got a sunburn. We aerated the lawn and put down the preen. We felt like Spring had arrived.

This weekend I’ll be freezing my butt off at soccer and hoping it will warm up again soon. Well, not LITERALLY freezing my butt off. If that were the case, I would have no butt. Think of how much weight I could lose if my butt really froze off at last night’s soccer game. That would make the FREEZING cold temps worth it.

My little John had a fever last night. I wasn’t home to administer the necessary fever busting tylenol at bedtime, but I don’t think it would have made much of a difference. At 1 in the morning, something woke me up. It was John complaining that there was no toilet paper in the kids’ bathroom. He was groggy and out of it, and so was I. I took him into our bathroom, where there is lots of toilet paper. I felt his face and it was VERY hot.

I told him to wait in the hall while I went downstairs to get some medicine for him. I made it about three steps. I don’t know if I had gotten up too fast, or if I was sick, too, or what my problem was, but I found myself laying down on the floor in the hall, trying to gather the strength to go downstairs and get him some medicine. There he is sitting on the floor, looking at mommy, who’s laying on the floor, and he feels yucky, I feel yucky, we all feel yucky. I scooted down the stairs, as I didn’t trust myself to walk down standing. I grabbed him some medicine and a drink of water, and somehow made it back up the stairs.

There we sat, while he drank his medicine and some water. Finally, he said he was tired and we went into his room to get him back into bed. I literally crawled on all fours down the hall and into his room. He told me he didn’t want to have a nightmare, so I stayed by him. I sat on the floor next to his bed and smoothed his hair lightly and said a prayer that his fever would come down. There we stayed for a few minutes until his breathing evened out and I could tell he was asleep.

As I moved from sitting to all fours to try to get up, I realized I had been sitting on a small monster truck. Hmm. I thought something felt funny. I managed to stand up and make it back to my own bed, where I collapsed and fell back asleep.

I don’t know how long it was until he was there again. He was thirsty, and could he sleep in my bed with me? Sure, I said, and moved over. I would almost rather have my kids close when they are sick, so I know if their fever breaks or gets worse, and I can hear their breathing. It doesn’t mean I can really sleep with a child in my bed. Our moving around woke Ryan up for a minute, and I asked him to get me the pillow that was on the floor on his side, since John had taken over my pillow. I think I went back to sleep eventually, until John was moving around beside me. “Can I sleep in the middle?” he asked. “Sure.” I moved out of the way, so he could move over to the middle, disrupting both of his parents with his squirming.

Eventually, we all must have gone to sleep. I woke up when the other kids started to get up and turn on lights. John also woke up and wanted more water. Still feverish.

So, here we are. He’s still got a fever, and I’m wasted. I don’t know what was up with me in the middle of the night. Sometimes middle of the night wake-ups do that to me. I get cold sweats and feel like I may throw up or collapse. Does that ever happen to you, or is it a weird anomaly found only in me?

I found an ibuprofen in a different flavor that John will take without complaining, and he’s had some breakfast. He’ll spend a lot of time on the couch today, I’m sure. He’s got his friends, the wonderpets, to entertain him right now. And I may just crawl back upstairs and into bed. It was a rough night.

I haven’t been blogging much lately. Have you missed me? Have you wondered, “Why isn’t Paige blogging regularly this past week?” Did you even notice, or have you not checked anyway? It’s not that I haven’t had tons going on that I could blog about.

I could blog more about basketball, and how Megan’s team WON THEIR GAME on Thursday against that super good team, but lost to them on Friday night, so they took second place overall in the under 13 bracket. And I could mention how I went to Cole’s Grand Concert on Friday night instead of going to Megan’s championship game, and how I was on the phone with my friends until just a few minutes before the concert started trying to get all the details. I could mention that I called Ryan at the game, and he was extremely short with me. “Score’s 11 to 15, the other team’s ahead. Can’t talk now,” was about the gist of my conversation with him.

Or I could blog about toilets. Yes, indeed, toilets. We’ve had some toilet incidences around here lately, and I actually bought two brand new plungers today while at Target. There ought to be something funny in that, right? But I couldn’t come up with a decent post about it, so it doesn’t get a post. I will share a knock knock joke that is in the toilet family, which I credit to my friend Courtney and her first grade students.
“Knock knock”
“Who’s there?”
“Freep”
“Freep who?”
“Bwaaa, haaa, haaa, haaa!!! Freep Who!!!! FREE POO!”
I know. Extremely funny if you are in first grade.

I could regale you with tales of our ALL DAY bell choir activities on Saturday. And when I say all day, I really do mean All Flippin Day. Seriously. We got there at 8 am, and we left a little before 6 pm. All day. It was exhausting. But, really, unless you are a bell ringer, you don’t want to hear my stories of our bell exploits and the guest director and what we had for lunch and the big old thick gymnastics pad that Lynda was smart enough to bring for us to stand on for all those hours of ringing. Do you?

I could tell about our fun family home evening that we had this week, where instead of having a lesson, we played a fun game called Burn the House down. It was really a trial run for me, since I’m also going to do that game for our Relief Society party in a couple of weeks. I think it went very well, and the whole family (21 of them in all last night) seemed to have a good time. My niece even left us a thank you note on a scrap of paper that said, “Thanks for hosting such a fun FHE!”

I could bemoan my constant failure in the “Biggest Loser Challenge” I’m doing with my sister and some of her friends right now. And how in 6 weeks I have only lost 5 pounds. I could probably write quite a lot about that. But it would be no fun to read, since it’s no fun to do, and I’m not succeeding at it anyway.

Or I could write something awe inspiring about the blossoming of spring and how I love hearing the birds outside and seeing the tulips and the daffodils and the crocuses coming up through the cold dirt. I could, really.

That is, I could write about those things if I had the tiniest spark of creativity in my brain right now.
(Sound of crickets chirping)

But sometimes there just isn’t any creativity going on. Sometimes I (gasp) can’t think of anything witty or even fun to write. Sometimes I’m just boring.

Sigh.

Things I learned from watching “The Office”

A great knock knock joke!
Knock, knock
Who’s there?
KGB?
KGB Who?
(slap to the face) (In a german accent) WE Will ask the qwestions!

Michael: Hey! Hey! You Idiot!

Darrel: Start over.

**I can use this approach with my kids, right? Anytime they start out a sentence with whining or mean words, I’ll just throw them a “Start over.”

I learned a new word. “Profiligate”

And I learned a great reason to keep a diary. “To keep secrets from my computer.”

And sometimes you should just take credit for you own ideas. Even if they might get you into trouble. Golden ticket, anyone?